3 Essential Questions to Ask Your Parents This Holiday Season
The holidays are a time for connection, reflection, and family traditions. They’re also a rare chance to have important conversations with loved ones about their wishes for the future. While these discussions can be uncomfortable, asking the right questions now can save your family from confusion and heartache later. Start introducing theses issues gradually when the time seems appropriate so that discussions can become more natural and cause less anxiety.
Here are three essential questions to start talking about these issues if you have an opportunity during time together:
1. What do you want your end of life to look like if you become ill?
Why It’s Important:
This question is about more than life support or medical interventions. It’s about understanding what matters most to your parents in their final days—whether that’s being surrounded by family, staying in their home, or specific decisions about terminating life support.
How to Approach It:
Use empathy and focus on their values. “I want to make sure I honor your wishes. What would be most important to you if you became seriously ill?”
2. What do you hope any money you leave us will do for us?
Why It’s Important:
Inheritance can be a sensitive topic, but understanding your parents’ intentions helps you make decisions that align with their values. Ask not only what they want the money to accomplish but also what they fear could go wrong.
How to Approach It:
Keep the tone curious and caring. “What impact would you love for your money to have on our lives? Is there anything you’d hate to see happen with it?”
3. If you could not care for yourself, where would you want to live?
Why It’s Important:
Deciding between in-home care and a nursing home can be emotionally and financially overwhelming. Knowing their preference helps you plan and prepare.
How to Approach It:
Be specific and thoughtful. “If something happened where you couldn’t care for yourself, would you prefer to stay at home or consider a nursing home? What kind of care would make you feel comfortable?”
Planning for the Future Is About More Than Paperwork
These questions aren’t easy to ask, but they’re vital. Estate planning isn’t just about drafting documents—it’s about asking the hard questions, hearing your loved ones’ wishes, and ensuring they feel heard and protected. This holiday season, start the conversations that will bring peace of mind to your entire family.
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This article is not intended to provide legal advice or opinion and should not be relied on as such. Legal advice can only be provided to clients of McPhillips Law in response to a specific fact situation.
